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Post by TechnologicMau5 on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 9:25

I get it. I always thought I knew what others meant, but I clearly see that I never fully understood until tonight. Please excuse me, but I feel like it's worth a full explanation.

You see, it's 12:28am for me right now, and today (yes, technically yesterday Razz ) was honestly a normal day for me. Woke up, played games, watched TV, showered, ate, then caught the bus to an evening shift at my part-time job. Pretty easy. Except, there are plenty of things under my skin every day that I just manage to get by with. Personal frustrations and grievances that I could frankly talk about for hours, but that's not why I'm here writing this. Thankfully I have enough piece of mind, and enough friends to help me get by day-to-day.

So I get home from work at 10:15, grab a snack, and hop on to Netflix to continue watching season 7 of "The Office". After a few episodes, I decide to go play Overwatch for an hour or two with one of my close friends. We win. First round we push all the way through the defense, and the second we stop the attackers before they even get the first checkpoint. Then it hits me. I back out of the game, and grab a glass of cold water, suddenly sick to my stomach thinking, "maybe I'm dehydrated?" But I'm not. I'm not pale (at least not as pale as I usually am Wink ), and I've been drinking water all day. It's stress. I end up sitting in my bathroom having my first anxiety attack in a long time. It happens. I've had them before. It's just part of how I work, and I've learned to manage them. Don't worry, this isn't a cry for help.

Eventually, I calm myself enough to head back to my room. I slowly sit back down in my chair, put on my headset, and tell my friend that I can't handle Overwatch right now, and that I'll probably just go to bed to help calm myself down. That's what I've always done. But then I remembered I wanted to give the MX-5 a test run for the ABRC coming up. So I decided to give it a go, prepared to turn off my Xbox and go to bed at any moment that my anxiety starts to spike again. So I buy an MX-5, and load up Hockenheim, and after 1 lap I can already notice that I am significantly calmer. After 2 laps I am focused like usual, working to find the line, and improve my lap time anywhere I can. I continue this for 15 minutes until I realize that I am perfectly calm again, and now I get it.

I have seen people post multiple times before, honestly sharing their struggles, and how they've used online racing, and our community to help them get by. I always thought I understood. I sympathized and appreciated how helpful an online escape can be. I've been there before with other games. But tonight, I realized moreover how important TORA can be. It has compounded my feelings of the united duty we all have to each other to keep this a safe place. A place that any of us can use to simply escape our everyday problems, relax, and calm ourselves.

Sure, we won't always agree, and we'll get in each other's way, and we'll make mistakes, but at the end of the day, it's a game. Some of us like to take it seriously and compete. Some of us just like to drive, and don't care where we end up. But some of us need online racing to get us through another day. Those people are constantly changing too, you never know who in your lobby might be there because they just need a break. Today it was me, tomorrow it will be someone else.

So I'm posting this here, because I have the unfortunate feeling - based on a few instances in the last few months - that the community needs a reminder. A reminder that by racing here, we all have an obligation to treat each other with decency and respect. So please, whenever you go to say something in a TORA lobby, or you write up a post here on the forum, think: "Does this need to be said?" "Is this the best way to say this?" "Can this be interpreted as an attack towards someone?" Asking yourself questions like these can make TORA a better, more efficient place for everyone, and can keep someone's bad day from getting even worse.

Cheers


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Post by HCR Bellmond on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 10:07

Well said mate!!!

+1000000000000000000
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Post by F4H Lotterer on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 10:32

Cheers
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Post by dinosilenzi on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 11:08

Respect mate! Cheers
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Post by Standaman94 on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 11:41

What are you on about, this place makes me stressy as hell Razz

jk obviously, TORA is where we get away from reality Smile


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If you want to survive out here, you've got to know where your towel is.
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Post by ErebusV8 on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 13:24

Love it Evan!!
I have pretty serious depression and anxiety, so much so that early 2011 I was having some pretty scary thoughts.

in November 2011 I joined TORA and the impact it has had is just incredible. yes we have disagreements and that'll happen, we're only human, but the escape it gives, and the enjoyment it brings vastly outweighs the bad.
I cannot wait until October when I get the NBN and better internet because there is a lot of people I miss racing with and internet is preventing that.

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Post by Ax4x Mikey J on Sat 20 Aug 2016 - 16:33

Cheers


______________________
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1st 2012 MMTCC Sedan Championship 2016 VTCC TC250 US Championship 2017 TORA Club Racer D UK Championship
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Post by Vice255 on Tue 23 Aug 2016 - 18:39

Cheers, man. I've been busy with school and everything so although I'm not racing every weekend anymore I still look forward to when I can because that is an escape for so so many of us, obviously including myself.

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Post by BigChungusCN on Mon 29 Aug 2016 - 18:14

Decency and Respect is defo needed (I know coming from me)


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Post by CRA XenoMorph on Wed 31 Aug 2016 - 8:26

HCR Bellmond wrote:Well said mate!!!

+1000000000000000000


+2000000000000000000

Great write up Cheers
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Post by TRAC stug77 on Mon 10 Oct 2016 - 9:10

Awesome much respect and I feel where your coming from...... I'm type one diabetic and just diagnosed with stage 4 kidney failure so I know only to well the stress and strains of everyday life mate so know 1000% where your coming from.

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Post by ATR DAN on Tue 11 Oct 2016 - 18:33

Hey dude.
I've only just got a chance to read this and I must say, I agree with you 1000000000000%. I remember when before I joined the ranks here at TORA, I really didn't have any friends as I'm a complete loner. But by being here for eight years, I've known and still speak to some really great people in this community of ours and made some really good friends along the way. It's opened my eyes massively. Not only that, but I've also been able to find communities which I never knew existed, like Radio Le Mans for example, and it was all through our motorsport breveran here at TORA. Now, I've been converted to sportscar racing instead of Formula 1 which is ace. Very Happy

I could go on because this place has done so much for me and it really is an honour to serve as a member of staff, something which I never thought was possible.

The anxiety attacks really are atrocious to put up with and try to control. I also suffer with depression so this place is a safe haven for me to get away from the troubles of the real world and get on with something which we all enjoy, which is to race cars.
For those who didn't know, yesterday was World Mental Health Day and it's something which I take seriously. All credit and huge respect to you Evan & everyone else for speaking out and I would definitely encourage more people to do so. If there's any troubles or issues you guys are having, please don't be afraid to speak out and we are willing to listen/read through your thoughts/worries. We are a community and so I expect a lot of respect for each when it comes to personal issues.


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